What Am I Scared Of?
Everything? Is that a valid answer? I mean let's take away the obvious ones for the time being - my Mum dying, losing the rest of my family, snakes, being sick, small spaces, the word moist - and instead let's delve a little deeper. What am I truly scared of? I feel like I'm going to come at this with a two pronged approach so bare with me. Prong one: failure. I'm not going to go fully into my daddy issues at this stage (although maybe that is something for a future post) but essentially I grew up knowing that my biological father didn't love me at all. He loved his alcohol and he truthfully wished I wasn't alive. I think coming to terms with that as a child and a young adult manifested in me a real fear of failure. I mean if my own parent couldn't love me then fundamentally there must be something really wrong with me, right? No amount of counsellors, friends, family or loved ones trying to tell me the exact opposite can really change my mind on this, and w...